# Im incredibly close to giving up on my budgies



## Dekfroo (9 mo ago)

Earlier this year I made a post about my two budgies Chitter and Chatter, I love them both very much, but they are incredibly shy and and skittish. I know it still hasn't been a long time, but my budgies are absolutely petrified when I come near them. I can't clean their cage without losing even more trust because they don't understand what is happening and run away by getting out of the cage, but they haven't been tamed yet so I have to "catch" them with a cloth and put them back inside. Im almost certain that's part of why they fear me so much, but they don't know how to get back to their cage on their own and refuse to let me help them back. I thought things were going well because they would eat out of my hand and didn't mind my presence generally but I guess I was wrong. At this point I think I'm just unintentionally traumatizing them, they don't view me as a friend, or even a passive creature. They dread me. I am near the cage almost 24/7 because It's summer and I'm unemployed, I spend time playing games and reading near them, nothing really helps. I feel like I am wrong for keeping them, and that I'm forcing them to live in fear because I'm inexperienced. Should I just give them away to someone who is more experienced in caring for budgies?


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## ChickWas (May 6, 2021)

Don't beat yourself up, these are doubts and frustrations we've all had as owners. It's been a year for me, but reading your post gave me flashbacks. I remember the stress and terror I'd induce trying to clean my budgies' cages. There's no avoiding it, unfortunately. It'll eventually become routine and they'll realise it's not a big deal. Though I remember trying to make the experience less terrifying by letting my two out before cleaning their cage. Though that's a lot easier for me as mine were hand tame.

Have you tried collecting them with a perch and some millet? It'd beat using a cloth. Either that, or eventually they'll make their way to their cage for food / water. Though I've had great luck in the past with the perch method, as it gives them enough distance from you, but something familiar (the perch) to hop onto. Then you can slowly and calmly position them to the cage and they should hop back in.

Things are going well! If they're eating out of your hands, that's great. It's just easy for the little dumb dumbs to fall into their prey mindset and get scared of everything once something sets them off. In this case, it's the cage cleaning that puts them into flight or fright mode. Can you take a picture of your cage? Maybe there's some way to clean it that involves the minimal amount of stress for your two. Otherwise, start trying to let them hop up onto a perch with millet and bring them out of the cage, that'll give you all the space in the world to clean their cage and not stress them out. Over time, them being able to observe what you're doing from a distance will calm them both down.

All this being said and done however, budgies are still really silly sometimes. I've had my two for a year and a half now and they still haven't gotten the memo about cleaning days. I'll bring them both out of their cages but they'll still get really spooked at the vacuum / broom / whatever.


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## Budgie.Lover (7 mo ago)

I understand why you feel this way. For the cage I would get a separate cage to put the birds in while you clean the main cage. I had the same problem with my birds but after a while they realized that I’m not going to hurt them. Now when I’m gone for a few hours they are screaming and flying around looking for me.


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## Penzance (May 17, 2015)

Personally I don’t even try to tame budgies now - I just enjoy them being there. In my experience they do love routine, and this along with consistent talking to them, can calm them down, even if it takes what seems like forever. It is only in the last two months that my hen Heidi is not spooked by the clean out - after more than a year! And she now accepts me catching her to move her - she used to draw blood! If your budgies chatter then they are happy. Do we really need the physical contact and perching on our fingers? Nice, but not essential in my view! 🙂


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## JimP (7 mo ago)

I think it’s sad you’re not able to interact with your birds. I’d offer advice but my Method includes clipped wings which isn’t well received in most forums. Keep trying as an interactive budgie is a LOT of Fun! Although they can be a pain in the rear. In a fun way. Ours has been running this house for over a year. He is fully flighted and has been ever since the initial clipping. He interacts with everyone....

my bird was not hand fed when purchased. you would never know.


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## Dekfroo (9 mo ago)

Thank you very much!!! It’s very reassuring to hear that I’m not the only one to have this issue. I’ll try to wait for them to calm down and lure them in with treats so that I won’t have to use a cloth or anything. I’ve decided to try and start back at square one, giving them millet spray as a treat from outside of the cage so they feel safer and more accustom to my hands. Do you have any advice for how to feed them new foods? I’ve tried lettuce, cabbage, carrots and apple and they are terrified of everything but millet. I succeeded in getting one to eat a good amount of apple but that’s the most I could do…

Also, side note: Chitter has clipped wings while Chatter does not. I got them both from a pet store before I had done enough research to know I should buy from a breeder, so this is probably a big contributor to their fear of… everything


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## Budgie.Lover (7 mo ago)

Dekfroo said:


> Thank you very much!!! It’s very reassuring to hear that I’m not the only one to have this issue. I’ll try to wait for them to calm down and lure them in with treats so that I won’t have to use a cloth or anything. I’ve decided to try and start back at square one, giving them millet spray as a treat from outside of the cage so they feel safer and more accustom to my hands. Do you have any advice for how to feed them new foods? I’ve tried lettuce, cabbage, carrots and apple and they are terrified of everything but millet. I succeeded in getting one to eat a good amount of apple but that’s the most I could do…
> 
> Also, side note: Chitter has clipped wings while Chatter does not. I got them both from a pet store before I had done enough research to know I should buy from a breeder, so this is probably a big contributor to their fear of… everything


Introducing new foods can be hard. I would recommend getting fruits that aren’t to wet and mixing it with their seeds. Once they start getting used to the fruit/veggies you can use a separate bowl for the fruits/veggies. This is what I did with my budgies, now they just can’t get enough!


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## JimP (7 mo ago)

My boy came from a big box pet store. he was purchased as a baby. He was out of the cage within 12 hours of being here. He came home at 6 pm and was out by 6 am. His wings were clipped. I had him on my finger that morning. Was he scared yes. I took him out every hour the first day for ten minute intervals. Was he scared? Yes. Did he learn we weren’t going to hurt him? yes!!! He learned to ride around on his mom the first week doing ride alongs. He is an only bird. He gets all our attention. He’s sitting on the couch right now getting a head scratch from mom while I type this. He’s used us as his personal jungle gym all evening. I’m a firm believer in getting them out and interacting with humans as quickly as possible. A family member used my same routine. Very, very similar results. There’s must be sitting on people when he’s able. Neither one is at all afraid of humans. I should say I am not a first time bird owner and had a subscription to bird talk magazine for many years in the 80’s. My methods may not work for everyone but, my bird was tamed within days and we’ve been enjoying our very interactive bird for over a year. Good luck.


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## StarlingWings (Mar 15, 2013)

Birds have different personalities which determine how well they bond with humans and while some birds may adapt well to the situation described above, others may be terrified and find it harder to bond with humans afterwards. That's why on the forums we advise all members to have at least a two-week period for new birds to settle into their cage and surroundings without trying to touch them so that they can acclimatize to their new surroundings. However, this does not mean they are not interacting with humans. It's very important to talk with them, sit with them, and include them in "family" activities as much as possible by having them nearby, etc. 

It's important for birds to be trustful of you and not submissive in order to have good bond; not all birds will learn to trust after being constantly handled without any gradual introduction 👍


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## FaeryBee (May 9, 2011)

*The purpose of this forum is to promote the BEST PRACTICES in the care of budgies for their optimal Health and Well-Being*
*Locating an Avian Veterinarian*

*We do NOT promote "wing clipping" as a method of taming and bonding with new budgies.

WIth time and patience budgies can be tamed without subjecting them to having their wings clipped.
Fully flighted birds are much healthier and happier. A bird "bonds" to a person when the bird chooses to be with the human.
The majority of budgies need a minimum of two weeks to settle into their new environment. That is not to say there are not exceptions but our Best Practices advise giving your budgies time to settle in and become used to the environment.
Budgies should not be forced to be touched or held.*

*A Healthy Diet for your Budgie*
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*Please take the time to read through the Site Guidelines, the FAQs, the Budgie Articles and all of the Stickies located at the top of each section of the forum.

Truly, the very BEST advice anyone can offer you is to take the time to read ALL of the stickies throughout the various Talk Budgie forums as well as the Budgie Articles we have posted.
(Stickies are threads “stuck” at the top of each forum sub-section)
These are great resources for Talk Budgie members and have a wealth of reliable information which will assist you to learn the best practices in caring for your budgies for their optimal health and well-being.*

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