# How long until they like me?



## beep (Jan 6, 2016)

Hello again! I'm here with a lil update on Spoon and Pudding's taming progress. After two months of daily training with me, they are still refusing to step onto my finger. That said, I have made a lot of progress! Spoon and Pudding have gotten very good about eating treats from my hands and coming out of their cage for exercise/playtime. They seem to be enjoying themselves a lot more lately and are less frightened of me. My biggest issue right now is the fact that they absolutely will not step up. I'm worried about this because I feel like they don't respect me or care about me at all. Sounds stupid when I say it like that, but it's kind of depressing since I really wanted a good relationship with these guys. All the stuff I've read lists stepping up as a first step in becoming friends with your budgie. I feel like they only see me and think "here comes the giant dish-filler" instead of "oh yay, here comes my friend with treats!". They still hop away when I ask them to get on my finger (even when I hold treats), and they won't let me pet them for more than a few seconds before they fly off. It's really discouraging, but I'm trying to stay determined.

So how long was it before your budgie started to really _like _you? Am I being impatient again or should I try a different approach to this?

Thanks again!


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## FaeryBee (May 9, 2011)

*Manda,

First of all, most budgies don't like to be petted once they pass the baby stage. Additionally, you should never pet your budgie on it's back or tail.
The head, neck and tummy are OK, but only IF your budgie likes it.

Taming and bonding with two budgies is always more difficult than taming and bonding with one. The birds will be more bonded to one another than to you. 
Working with each budgie individually will generally have better results than trying to work with them together.

Another thing to remember is that some budgies simply prefer the company of one another rather than that of a human.

Budgies are not human and you can not think that you will ever have "respect" from a bird. 
Expecting that to happen is simply hoping for the impossible. 

Instead of focusing on what you want, try to learn to love and enjoy your budgies for what they are. 
Each budgie is unique and special. Simply watching them can bring you hours of entertainment and enjoyment.

Too many people get budgies thinking the budgie is going to want to hang-out with them like a dog or cat. 
That is simply not the way things usually work out.

Be patient, give them time and enjoy the journey of learning along with them.*


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## Budget baby (Jan 1, 2013)

Manda Deborah has explained the situation wonderfully.
Even hand raised budgies will not allow or like to be held, petted for the sake of it.
They do not accept this behaviour as loving to them it is threatening and can cause them anxiety.
Larger Parrot species are more easily agreeable to this sort of handling but it takes patience and a great deal of work on the owners behalf to get to that stage.
Patience, time and acceptance are your greatest traits when establishing a bond with your birds.


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## Therm (Aug 2, 2015)

Deb and Cathy have given you great advise. 
I'd just like to add that I got Jimmy as a solo bird to tame and he never warmed to me and it didn't take me long to decide another bird would be better company for him. None of my birds are tame. They will come over to me when they want to see what I'm doing and I love that they do this. They are naturally curious and that shows. So I let them be birds and if they come over its great and if not, that's fine too. I just love that they are happy healthy and content. 
Just keep working with them.


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## Penzance (May 17, 2015)

Yes, I agree with all that has been said. There are so many variables - the individual bird, politics of the cage, their experiences before meeting you etc etc. Sometimes they simply do not want to tame. But that shouldn't lessen your enjoyment of them - they can still learn to love you (or at least tolerate you!) without physical interaction. Only one of my 4 budgies is hand tame, and we still all have a very agreeable relationship. So that's three I have to catch for various reasons, and they resist. However, immediately the ordeal is over and they are where I need them to be they are not stressed at all, in fact I suspect they enjoy the chase! Take budgies on their own terms and I promise keeping them is just as rewarding!


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## satma (Oct 23, 2015)

I found it easier to work with my birds one at a time so if im working with Bojangles i left Levi in the cage and vice versa i just found that when training if both were out the would run to each other squawk more. And there was always a reward for doing what i wanted them to do. The only other tip was to always remain calm when approaching them if they can pick up on your frustration and that may make them feel a little on edge. Keep trying you'll get there.


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## StarlingWings (Mar 15, 2013)

Spoon and Pudding look very cute in that picture  

I can't possibly agree more with the advice above  Patience, trust, and love are the key--each budgie has its own personality to get to know, and some may take more time than others. Since they're together, their comfort zone is to be with each other, they will take time to start to bond with you but it's definitely not impossible, so keep at it!


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