# On verge of giving up...



## Squidzz (Apr 24, 2017)

Hey guys! I feel like i have hit a wall with taming my budgie 

She will eat millet from my hand and step up on my finger but only inside of her cage. She also looks very afraid when she is on my finger. i have had her for about 3 or 4 months and it is starting to get frustrating. i don't think she is very old and i believe she is going through her first molt at the moment

i bought her from a pet store, which i regret. i wish i would have gotten her from a breeder who hand raised them.

i don't want to sell her or get rid of her because that i don't want to make her stressed with a new environment. 

I just need help on what to do to make her more friendly, i want her to really be my friend and companion but as of now, she just seems really afraid of me.

please help me and reply with tips on what i should do and how to handle this situation. thanks! :grey:


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## Therm (Aug 2, 2015)

Have you taken the time to look through the posts on taming and bonding? They will give you the very best advice and things to try. 
Reading other members training and bonding journals will help you understand the journey others have gone through to get where they are at. 

Getting frustrated will only reinforce any fear your girl is feeling. Budgies can pick up on stress and emotions so wanting her to love you doesn't help anyone. 
If you're not in a good place emotionally to try and bond with her, don't try and bond with her. 

Having a hand raised budgie doesn't mean you get a tame budgie. There's so much work that goes into it that comes from the owner. Yes, it might help, but personality is just as important. 

Not all budgies have the same personality. The same way you may have friends who like to gather and be social and may have some who prefer their own company or interacting in smaller groups. Budgies are the same in that they don't all want to be friends with us. 

That doesn't mean give up. 

Reading the taming and bonding section will be most helpful. 

Working at her pace and when you are emotionally in the right place will help. 

Accepting the limits that she has in regards to bonding with you will help. 

Accept that for her, you are a very frightening, large creature, that might not do her any harm, but she is a creature that is genetically designed to be alert and fearful of predators. 

Forget about what you have seen others do with their budgies and embrace the one you have.


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## FaeryBee (May 9, 2011)

*Therm has given you excellent advice.
You also need to recognize that not all budgies want to "bond" with their owner. 
Some budgies are happiest being left alone to simply be a budgie.

Don't try to force her to come out of her cage. 
Her cage is her safe place and when she isn't interested in interacting with you, you need to respect that.

When you are in the room to supervise, you can leave her cage door open to see if she will (in time) venture out on her own to explore. 
Try setting up a playgym nearby outside her cage (on top of the cage if the cage is flat) with a couple of favorite toys and perhaps a treat.

Take the time to carefully review these threads (as well as the other stickies in the Training and Bonding section)

http://talkbudgies.com/taming-bonding/237105-using-positive-reinforcement-training.html

http://talkbudgies.com/taming-bonding/265337-basics-clicker-training.html*


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## PedroBudgie (Jul 14, 2017)

Hi Squidzz! I was hoping I would come on here and see a post like this, it sounds like my exact situation.

We have had Pedro for 3 months. Almost from day 1 he would get on my finger (he shakes to start with but calms down after 5 mins) but he doesn't seem to have progressed from at all  

Whilst on my finger I've managed to get him out of his cage maybe 10 times, but if he figures out what's going on he will freak out before he gets to the door and fly to the corner of his cage. I've done it very slowly and he will stay on me while he's out, it's just getting him there that's the problem!

If you do find anything that makes yours less nervous, please let me know as I'm running out of ideas!


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## FaeryBee (May 9, 2011)

*


PedroBudgie said:



Hi Squidzz! I was hoping I would come on here and see a post like this, it sounds like my exact situation.

We have had Pedro for 3 months. Almost from day 1 he would get on my finger (he shakes to start with but calms down after 5 mins) but he doesn't seem to have progressed from at all 

Whilst on my finger I've managed to get him out of his cage maybe 10 times, but if he figures out what's going on he will freak out before he gets to the door and fly to the corner of his cage. I've done it very slowly and he will stay on me while he's out, it's just getting him there that's the problem!

If you do find anything that makes yours less nervous, please let me know as I'm running out of ideas!

Click to expand...

Please read the advice in the posts earlier in this thread. 
Also, please take the time to introduce yourself and your budgie in the "Introductions" section of the forum.*


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